Wednesday, 22 September 2010

Bedtime Story..

Heartbreak is worst than cancer. It took away your happy thoughts, creativity, radiance and hope. At least cancer took your life away & that's it. You no need to live with it forever - live or die. But you can’t go to any doctor and ask for specific prescription on heartbreaks. No prevention, no cure.. even somesay “only time will heal”.. but tell me how many of us really, definitely healed after sometime or longtime?


Only self denials always emphasized that they finally got over it, moved on, ok, fine after a heartbreak. But the truth - there is hatred, regret, phobia, grew inside them after a heartbreak. Tears still rolling every time they think about it (even after 10 years) and heartbreaks really change a person into another. So, tell me..how healed are we after a heartbreak?


People try to erase the pain with new love, new relationship. Peoples always said “he’s not the best for you.. and that’s why it didn't work out” well, that’s a total bullshit. Are they trying to tell you that.. for every break up, your exes never good enough for you and that is why you had this failure after another because no one is up to your best, yet? Fuck that.


No matter how better your new love is, don’t deny that you still hope that you see a glimpse of similarity of your badass Ex in your new love. Because IF you are REAL, you fell for someone for who they are, good or bad, thick or thin..rich or poor..because you are not perfect as you think yourself  and imperfection has its own charms.


I don’t know what is my point in here. But please don’t tell me that I will forget, continue to live on, move on and will find someone better. Because he’s all what Im looking for but we are not meant for each other, for NOW. No, Im not looking to find a new relationship in order to forget this. If this is wrong and lead my life to nothing but pain – so be it. At least Im not lying to any new poor guy of how happy he making me feel.


and Gavin darling ~ thanks for having me understand the feel of true love. I never knew that I finally understand how sweet the love is.. until I met u angel... u made me feel 17 all over again for the past few years.. & now it's time for me to wake up to the present...where unicorn, santa claus, mermaid, true love...can only be heard in child's  bedtime story...

You always have my love.







43 Things Tags: ,
Technorati Tags: ,
LiveJournal Tags: ,

Thursday, 9 September 2010

Aidilfitri 2010

What can I say… Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri 2010 to all my muslim friends and enjoy your long weekend to the non muslim~!!!!

 

lebaran

 

del.icio.us Tags: ,
Technorati Tags: ,

43 Things Tags: ,

Tuesday, 7 September 2010

Ramadhan is leaving…

and it gave a different meaning as well as feeling to different people’s sentimentality. To the pious, it’s a sad goodbye. Because it’s the only month where benevolence and good deeds earn them multiple rewarding, prayers and repents are answered, a total body, mind and soul sanctification month.


to the believer (ordinary one ya) – it’s time to say goodbye to exotic gastronomy, invitations and special working hours punch out.


and to the sinner – finally able to eat and back to adulterate wonted.


as for me… I must admit, I wasted it a lot with, when heartbreak & tears has taken over me.
I took a break from posting my travel, vacation post during these few weeks because, I was mistaken having trip during Ramadhan. It was an assumption which I want to encounter the least although I am just an ordinary believer.


Forget about glamorous invitation by the hotelier, but still, there were one or two I unable to miss. =)

Ramadhan Event    107
It was berbuka puasa event with the living legends.


Ramadhan Event    090
I know I didn’t really follow their singing and acting evolution, but I do know them by heart and faces.


Ramadhan Event    058
 Ramadhan Event    069

Ramadhan Event    046
Ramadhan Event    094
tidak ada yang lama.. tak kan ada yang baru…



Ramadhan Event    026
Azhar, Mak Su & mama.. they are no strangers to me.. they are my family…


Ramadhan Event    037
with mama.


Ramadhan Event    142
With living legend, Datuk Ahmad Nawab who has shines many stars with his artworks.


Ramadhan Event    106
Lisa Surihani, she’s not a legend yet, but her beauty might be legendary among male fans =)
Malaysian mentality is still in a 3rd world class country when it comes to entertainment industry. Where talent MUST come with full package, and looks is a numero uno. Isn't superficial equivalent to shallowness?  Hey, but for her case, Im not a fan any of her dramas & movies cuz I hardly watch them. I just admire the God's beautiful creature. I just love beautiful people. =)  


Ramadhan Event    129
I always look up to Dato’ Mahathir Lokman as a male Oprah Winfrey Asia’s version. I wish he has a talk show like Oprah do.


Ramadhan Event    140
Just playing with aperture.


Ramadhan Event    117
Salamiah Hassan is always anggun & cute at every phase of her age. I told to myself once that Im gonna grow old gracefully just like her!


Ramadhan Event    154
I got nothing much to say about the event. Im not the kind of selling celebrities stories on my blog. Let those existing celebrity gossip blog do the best what they are doing. This is HeartBoxx, .. so it’s all about me. :P


Next few days I was at one of the event under Adibah Noor Entertainment & celebrities who care -  and I suddenly realized, how foolish I am crying and dying over someone who never returned back the same feelings for me… while there are lots of peoples out there living with the lack of everything… I sat and watching them speechless, because I knew that I never understood or felt the same feelings as they do.


ramadhan
I always cried and assume I was the unlucky one in love… but, this boy has his own sad story at the age of 3 and yet, he still able to smile without faking it. I should learn how to be more grateful….


If you care, visit them at;
Rumah Titian Kasih (Pusat Jagaan Anak Ibu Tunggal & Anak Yatim)
62A-2 Lorong Maran
Jalan Kuantan
Tasik Titiwangsa
53200 Kuala Lumpur
or visit their blogspot at http://rumahtitiankasih.blogspot.com/ for more infos and donations.


suddenly I miss my mum.. very much and regret remembering all the yelling and unreturned phone calls…Ma, please forgive me.


Sunday, 29 August 2010

Guide 101 : How to make a woman HAPPY?

I came across this very very interesting list in how to make a woman happy. I laughed for the 1st 15 second but then I come to think that, ey these all are very true.

Call it plagiarism, but still want to to share it with u.
It’s not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be;
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. courageous
39. prudent
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, U MUST ALSO;
51. give her lots of attention, expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
AND IT IS VER VERY IMPORTANT THAT;
54. Never to forget:
- Birthdays
- Anniversaries
- Arrangements she make

Give up already???

Well, this guide also came with a lil bonus guide in how to make a MAN HAPPY;
1. Show up naked
2. Bring food.

No wonder men turned into gays rapidly nowadays…
=(

happy woman

del.icio.us Tags: ,,,
Technorati Tags: ,,,
LiveJournal Tags: ,,,

Saturday, 28 August 2010

Forever?

“I love you, Forever.”


I was a fool for many many years for believing in it. Beware with the word ‘Forever’ cuz it can breaks your faith, trust, hope & dream. I don’t know why human created this word (forever) when they know there is nothing in this world could be described with it – life, love, fortune and fame has its own life span. Nothing lasts forever, scars and tattoos are removable. That’s how to describe how temporary we are and everything around us.

He was the centre of my affection for many years. He taught me the meaning of fidelity, virtue, simplicity and most of all - love is love, regardless age gap, race, religion, distance, background and ones need no reasons to love. I never had been feeling as sheltered as I was with him. He eased the doubt, anger, confusion and hollow in me for my life is quite fucked up due to stupid decisions and mistakes I’ve done in my past.

This feeling for him was so grand, and I kept it deep to the core of my heart. I refused to share my beautiful relationship with peoples around me because most of them are prejudice, skeptical and mean towards our kind of relationship and so I refused to listen to what they think about it. No one knows that I’m purely in blissful love for the past few years until he changed his mind and dropped the bomb by saying – “this is not going to work out, and the truth is, I mind our age gap.”  Then I realized, the truth is.. I was living in denial.



I cried for the whole week, until now, every time I think of him and time we had together. I survived my nights with the helped of sleeping pills and talked to my girlfriends. The thoughts of promises, the ring, the house and mini us flashed in and out in the back of my cornea and my mind. I tried to find his mistakes so that I can blame and hate him in order for me to move on, but all I found was mine. It was even more heartbreaking episode when he decided this at the time I missed and needed him the most. A friend told me that it would take a very special person for distance and age to truly not matter. So I came to the conclusion that I am not that lucky to be that special or maybe he changed his mind because he finally found someone who deserves him more than me.

..and I don’t want people to tell me to be strong and keep move on, because I am born survivor and I know any wound will eventually healed whether I wanted it or not. Everything has its own lifespan and so this pain – this is just another phase, it will eventually fade and vanish whether I wished it or not. But now, just let me cry a river.



I found this on his wall the day he dropped me which he posted it few days before.





..and so I know, what we had was only another tale story….

LiveJournal Tags: ,,
del.icio.us Tags: ,,

Thursday, 19 August 2010

Friday, 13 August 2010

Fallin’ for Bali..

crap

How easy to fall in love these days. And seriously they made love sounds like a crap. Easy, and valueless, cheaper than McValue meals. U need a couple of bucks to get your Mc Donalds’ big & tasty set, at least. But love, it is done with text and emails. Foolish.


And as for me, Im falling .. falling for Bali. It maybe doesn’t have the bluest water like an island supposed to have, but I fell for Bali..and I don’t mind going back again, there are so much to see and experience in Bali. The culture and architecture are well preserved, u’ll see spiritual carvings and ritual ceremony in every corner of your walk paths. The locals are very friendly, friendlier than any Malaysians I’ve been rubbing shoulder with. They speak to you as they known you for a very long time, at the moment you make an eye contact with them. Every glance u made, they replied with warmest smile. Never failed.


Bali 015

#1


Bali 014



































#2

Bali 030
























#3
“Bali is for Honeymooners” is too underrated. Becuz most honeymooners do is , sitting in their suite and fuck till sore. Bali is more than that. Surfer’s heaven, shopping lairs, scenic infinity! That was why.. 4 days wasn’t quite enough for Bali…Im so gonna revisit Bali for sightseeing I have missed. Kintamani, Ubud’s Tegalalang, Sunset at Jimbaran and Barong dance to name a few. Urggh..

Forgive me for the quality of my pictures. My dslr was handled by a friend who had no interest at all in
handling such camera. :P I always forgot to set to an “Auto” mode for him so, this is the result among many others. =(





Bali 060
#4

So, as our flight a bit delayed, we arrived at Seminyak region at 9pm. Everything was dark but the resort we checked in brightens our mood from exhaustion of 3 hours flight and long queue at Ngurah Rai’s airport. We stayed in Villa Seminyak Estate & Spa, a quiet place 20 minutes (by taxi) from lively Kuta town. If u are looking for a beach resort, this shouldn’t be the one since it is very far from the shore, and tanning by the beach wasn’t my main attention in Bali anyway. But the resort absolutely gave us the feeling of we’re surrounded by the beach! Is a total relaxation property after tiring sightseeing, club hopping and shopping.


Glance to our villa @seminyak Estate & Spa;

Bali 056
#5
Our lovely bed.



Bali 086
#6
Our villa facade, daytime.



Bali 097
#7
It’s a private villa. So we have the turf all for us.



Bali 338
#8
and our own jacuzzi! So who need beaches while u can skinny dipping into this?



Bali 090
#9
Wake up to a bright morning!



Bali 177
#10
Pathway to breakfast.



Bali 201
#11
Just for plain posing. The alleyway is too breath taking…Actually they provide a buggy transfer for every guest since it is a vast property, but we chose to walk since we didn’t see much during our night checked in.



Bali 238  
#12
The restaurant is right above the hotel lobby, giving you the view of…



Bali 239
#13
this, and


Bali 242
#14
this.

#15


#16
Meet up another few friends in Kuta, for lunch.

 #17
Yeaaahaaa.. Babi Guling in Bali is a must try!!! *Gilo apo* That chef looks like Datuk K tho.. LOL.


 #18
Mengucap banyak2...Actually there are too many restaurants, gift shops, tour booths and express spa along Poppies Lane I, Kuta. All you need is to make a right choice and bargain. And as for Bali Agung.. please DO NOT come here. their food sucks! 


#19
Do ur own conversion at www.XE.com < my favorite foreign exchange currency website.


 #20
This is Gado-gado Bali version. Served with rice

#21

Soto Ayam. Taste like maggie soup tho'. So nothing special.


#22
BBQ chicken..and the chicken smell like it dead 7 years ago.


#23
Worst food of the year lah. The sauce taste like my vomit. I think my vomit taste better than this.

Oh, the night of arrival we actually had our 1st dinner in Bali too, somewhere in Kuta area; 

#24

What else kalau bukan Nasi Padang!

#25

I don't know how real it was, but I finally had it in Bali Indonesia! (Before this I keep eating Indonesian food somewhere in Shah Alam and Damansara, hmm and the truth is.. it was better than the real Nasi Padang in Bali lah. Buang duit tiket flight je)

#26
The interior deco is very balinese? javanese? I don't know how to classify it. But looks and feel very traditional la. Makan bersila tu..

#27
Nah.. look at sea of lauk pauk. It taste weird tho'.. we keep comparing with Malaysian food since the ingredients and stuff were exactly the same.. but maybe the preparation was different. If I wasn't really that hungry, I can't swallow any of these. And I remember I just ate a bit of rice and a bit of friend chicken and that's it. The taste of the food was very strange to me.

The next day our tour guide told us that Nasi Padang actually isn't a fresh food. They tend to keep the unfinished foods and serve it on the next day, day after another. They can't throw the food, but mix it with new one in order to make a mounted, grand display for their window. Yuck!

#28

Another strange food which I don't dare enough to try. After listening to our tour guide, I have this eerie feelings about their food, and so I stick to western like steak and salad in order to prevent myself from starving.


To be continued with sightseeing tours and more awesome picces on the next post. Hehe.